U of A Board of Pantywaists

This week, we learned that Jeff Long has reportedly "...lost the support of many of our fans..." Which is understandable, if life working your uncles' farm supply store in Stuttgart isn't working out as well as you hoped, that ex-girlfirend you're stalking on Facebook just posted pictures from her #BLESSED family vacation to Seaside, and all you have to make yourself feel special is a loose allegiance to a bunch of 18 to 22 year olds.

The U of A Board Of Panty-wastes (pantywaists?) are all promising to find someone with "more Arkansas ties" to lead the program. Yeah, because more backslappers at the circle-jerk are exactly what we need to turn this Cleveland Steamboat right around.

All Jeff Long did was raise over $300 million for new facilities, double the Athletic Department's operating budget, and increase graduation rates to their highest levels in history. He gave a shit about piddly things like players, coaches and financial stability -- to the exclusion of far more important responsibilities, like sucking up to self-important mouth-breathers.

His unpardonable sin was firing a winning football coach who had a thing for very young girls -- which seems to work for Alabama. He brought in someone with a proven record of graduating players, keeping them (mostly) out of jail, and winning football games. And ... well ... two out of three ain't bad.

The good news for the entire Long family is that they are now free of this dumpster fire. All Jeff has to dry his tears is the remaining $4.8 million left on his contract.  It's the rest of us who have to continue to live thru this shit blizzard.

We will gather today to pour one out for brother Jeff, and continue to play the parlor game of pondering who might be willing to leave a good coaching position to work for this band of turd nuggets.

JJ's on Dickson St. -- 5:00 to 7:00
324 W. Dickson St