Editor's Note: Every week we make an effort to broaden our focus and report, reflect and enlighten readers on an ever expanding range of topics, issues and points of view, far beyond politics and culture. But if you thought we weren’t touching this ‘Trump and the PornStar' story, you’ve lost your ever-loving mind.

Throughout his first year in office, our president has had his difficulties truly connecting with about 65% of Americans. Sure, each of us can find one-or-two things we have in common with Donald J. Trump — for example, he and I are both 6’3” tall and neither one of us weigh 239 lbs. But it is difficult to fully envision his core beliefs when his world view is influenced by an entirely different set of life experiences than most.

Nevertheless, most every American has watched a Stormy Daniels film and thought “What an engaging young entertainer! I’d love to meet with her over coffee, and discuss her views on the Stanislavsky acting method.” Well, Donald J. Trump did more than that.

Trump reportedly paid Miss Daniels — star of such films as Porking with Pride 2, Love Potion 69, and The Witches of Breastwick -- $130,000 in hush money following their illicit (though “textbook generic”) encounter. No word on how Daniels' compensation compares with Mark Wahlberg’s re-shooting fees for his part in the same project.

This touching real-life pygmalion tale harkens us back to the heartwarming romantic vision of My Fair Lady — minus Trump chasing Stormy around a hotel room at the Harvey's Stateline Casino/Hotel in his tighty-whities.

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Trump reportedly has tiny hands, and we were curious how that would work — biologically speaking — with a pornstar who is more accustomed to working with co-stars who have, well, larger hands. We contacted Dr. Tammy Lorince, Official Micro-biologist of Friday Afternoon Drinks, to get her thoughts.

“How the hell would I know??? You know that’s not what I do, right? That literally has NOTHING to do with the study of Micro-biology. None.” When asked if she was aware of any significant research in this area, Dr. Lorince informed us that she has “absolutely ZERO interest in sitting around watching a bunch of pornos with you perverts." This includes other Stormy Daniels classics, Good Will Humping, Bikini Kitchen, and Two Girls for Every Girl-2. Concluding, “This entire conversation is really creeping me out.”

We asked if we could just chill with our clothes on, and watch Seinfeld with Aziz Ansari. Dr. Lorince abruptly hung up. She sounded really busy with work or something.